Romance in Lace - Carole Foster

Lauren

Today we have Carole with us, she's going to share her wedding story. She's from southeastern Pennsylvania and I'd also like to mention she's my grandma. So, when you were younger you had always dreamed of getting married. Can you talk about your process of getting married to grandpa?

Carole

When I was a little girl we lived in Connecticut. And my mom and I would always go for walks. My mom didn't work, just my dad. And I would always look in the windows and see these beautiful white wedding dresses. And IÕd say ÒOoh, how pretty!Ó And sheÕd say ÒYouÕre gonna have one of those one of these days when you get older!Ó And IÕd get all excited. And away we would go. And she'd always buy me a Sundae. I love Sundaes!

Lauren

Can you just tell me about when you met grandpa for the first time?

Carole

Grandpa and his father built my parentsÕ house. We moved into the house and I was in my last year of high school. And Grandpa came over to finish the garage in the back of the house. And he used to come to the door and ask me for a drink, and he did it quite often! And I liked him! And it was a number of years Ð I had graduated. And then he called me on the phone and asked me out and I was going out with someone else. But he kept going through the days until he hit one and I said ÒOkay!Ó And that's the way it all started!

Lauren

How many days did he have to go through to get you [to go] on a date?

Carole

About a week! He said if it had kept on going too much more he was gonna give up! But he didnÕt!

Lauren

Do you remember your first date?

Carole

I think we played miniature golf the first date. It was in May. And then shortly after that he took me to the Playhouse in New Hope and [he] took me to that fancy restaurant along the É on the river. We did a couple of things É maybe we went to a movie. And then the next date after that he asked me to go steady. And I said, ÒI'll let you know the next date.Ó So I don't know, I can't remember where we went the next date É probably to the movies. And I said ÒYesÓ and he got all excited! And that was the start of the engagement.

And that was in É that was May. He took me over to the jewelry store in Trenton, Croasdale and Englehart, and he said ÒPick out a ring.Ó So I did and he laid it away. But in the meantime he had gone and asked my father for my hand in marriage. And so he gave me the ring in August and we planned the wedding. It was in December. December 4th! That was interesting! We were supposed to go to Willow Grove Park and he was gonna give it to me on the Thunderbolt. It was like a thunderbolt! It was a little slower ride. But it was kind of like a thunderbolt. It was a roller coaster.

But it rained so he couldn't give it to me on there. So I had another ring on my finger as we were going home. And it was at that exit where you go off to Penndel. And he said ÒLet me see that ring of yours.Ó I don't know why he was doing all this while heÕs driving. But anyway he said ÒHere.Ó And he put the engagement ring on my finger. And it was slightly big so it kept falling over, the stone. And it was going É and I looked down and I screamed and I gave him a hug while he was driving!

Lauren

All the while on the highway!

Carole

Yeah, right! So every time I pass that exit I think of that!

Lauren

So after this slightly dangerous engagement, but very fun and happy memory for you, when did you start looking for a dress and how did you look for dresses at that time?

Carole

I didn't go out. I looked through the brides magazine. And I saw this dress and I liked it. And I thought ÒYeah, I like that.Ó My mom thought it was nice. So we went to Strawbridge and Clothier and I tried it on and I liked it, and that was it!

Lauren

Tried on one dress and that was it?

Carole

That was it!

Lauren

Do you remember what you felt like when you put it on?

Carole

Oh, I was happy! I was happy because, you know, he was the right one. That was exciting. And I thought the dress looked good on me. It was my type of dress.

Lauren

Can you describe it? Can you tell me about the dress?

Carole

ItÕs lace, but it had something underneath it. Been a long time since I looked at it! And it was it was a kind of a round neck and just a short sleeve, but then it was like a mitt that came three quarters up the arm. Full, full skirt with a hoop underneath it. Yeah. And I thought I looked great in it!

Lauren

I mean, as you should! You should feel like you look great in the dress you wear on your wedding day. Did he see it before you guys got married? Or did you keep it a secret before you went?

Carole

Oh no, nobody saw it! But he did go down to Philly with me to pick it up. But it was all wrapped up. So he didnÕt É he didn't know what it was like.

Lauren

So when you were walking down the aisle on the wedding day how did you feel in the dress?

Carole

I felt great! I was excited! This was my wedding day and I picked the right person! I felt like it was the best thing that ever happened!

Lauren

Did he say anything to you at the end of the aisle when you walked to him? Or afterwards about the dress or anything?

Carole

Hmm É no but I think he was excited. But he's a quiet man. He's a quiet man but very loving. Yeah. He's not, not kissy and all that out in public. He's very quiet, was a quiet, very quiet man, but very loving. He was very good to me.

Lauren

People back then really did dress up to go out. It was very important to look nice to go out. So when you went maybe on your first date or any of the subsequent dates, did you take as much care looking at those outfits as you did for your wedding?

Carole

I always had a beautiful dress on with high heels, jewelry, everything and he was always dressed up. There wasn't a date that we went on that I wasn't É unless it was down the shore. You know, but other than that, we always dressed up.

Lauren

So on your first date miniature golfing were you in a dress and high heels?

Carole

Yes! I always wore high heels.

Lauren

[When you] went to the movies you wore your dress and high heels?

Carole

Always! Every date. Yeah, I had some pretty dresses!

Lauren

Looking back at the time when you were a little girl looking at all of these wedding dresses and your mom saying ÒYou'll have one of these one dayÓ when you finally did get to wear one do you think that that was important to you for your wedding day to have a beautiful dress?

Carole

Yes, because it's one of the most important times of your life and one of the biggest choices of your life to pick the right person. And you want a perfect dress to go with that perfect person for that day.

Lauren

Do you think having the perfect dress makes a better wedding or a better marriage?

Carole

No, not a better marriage, a better wedding! YouÕve got to have the right man first!

Lauren

What makes the perfect dress in your opinion?

Carole

That it looks good on you, because there's a lot of different styles. Not every dress looks good on you. But that was my style at that moment at that time. That was É that was good for me.

Lauren

Can you tell me a little bit more about what drew you to that one dress considering you only tried on that one and that's the one you got married in?

Carole

It had a hoop under it which made the skirt full. The lace brought out all the design for the dress. The neckline was good for me and the short sleeve with the mitt. I think I just liked the picture in the magazine. It put me in mind of myself. And so I just felt the dress was good for me. And when I put it on it was true.

Lauren

What do you mean when you say it reminded you of yourself?

Carole

I think the woman looked like me. I felt she looked like me and she was built like me. And so therefore if the dress looked good on her I figured I would look good on me. I think it was romantic. It's a romantic dress.

Lauren

That's your one word to describe the dress, romantic?

Carole

Yeah!

Lauren

I know a little bit more about your background in that you did not have any issue finding men. Men were coming out of the woodwork for you! You were a gorgeous young lady! Because you had so many suitors and to find the one who was perfect for you -- and clearly you did because, you know, I know about how wonderful grandpa is -- do you think you wanted to find a dress that matched the perfection that you had found in a relationship?

Carole

The dress was very important and I figured it É I looked at it and I liked it on myself. But that's not the most important thing was who you were marrying!

Lauren

Was he different from the other men that you dated?

Carole

Oh, definitely! Yes he was exactly what I wanted. I liked the way he looked, I liked the way he acted, I liked the way he treated me. He did everything right. He did everything right. And he was a handsome man! A handsome man!

Lauren

Would you consider him a romantic person?

Carole

Oh yes, he was! Not in public. He was very strict. Not in public. Everything had to be proper, you know, no hugging and kissing in public. But he was a very romantic man. Very sweet. And he always said to me, ÒCarole, nobody will ever love you like I do.Ó He did say that to me. And it rings through my head all the time.

Lauren

And because no one ever loved you the way that he did, do you think for your wedding that that dress that you also described as romantic, do you think that your dress and grandpa really reflected each other in a way? And I know that your dress is not as important but sometimes we wear an outfit to sort of reflect how we feel about the world and ourselves. And if you wore a very romantic dress, you were marrying a very romantic man, however private he was. He was romantic for you, romantic with you. So do you think that your dress was romantic in a similar way that he was?

Carole

Yes. This was a big day for me. This is the moment that I'd always waited for, to be with the perfect person. He was perfect. Yeah, he was perfect all the way through life. He was perfect.

Lauren

And it's interesting. You've mentioned that he was a very private, romantic man and that a wedding is the opposite of private. It is a very public experience with your friends, your families, and to express love outwardly. So for him to do a public, you know, sort of declaration is a really big and romantic gesture on his part, you know, to do that and be shy and be a private person, don't you think?

Carole

He was very excited! He was there waaaay ahead of time! And he was not, he was very excited. He was very excited that day. Yes. He wasnÕt real shy that day!

Lauren

And you werenÕt being shy either!

Carole

I didn't sleep the night before that much. I was very excited!

Lauren

You got to have your romantic gesture, which was wearing this very beautiful gown, which reflected you because I mean, clearly youÕre a beautiful woman. And grandpa, you know, he's sitting out the [end of the] aisle going ÒI get to marry this beautiful woman in this beautiful gown you know?Ó

Carole

I think he was excited and he wanted to marry me right away you know? So that was a short time from May until December. Not too many people, that's not the way it goes. You know it's usually long engagements and all that, so he didn't want to wait. HeÕs the one who chose December. Most people donÕt choose December.

Lauren

Did you plan anything of the wedding other than the dress?

Carole

Oh we planned it all!

Lauren

You planned it all with him?

Carole

Yeah, both of us. Yeah.

Lauren

After the wedding did you wear the dress home?

Carole

Yeah, I wore it home to change into a suit, a blue suit.

Lauren

Did you want to take your dress off at the end of the night?

Carole

Oh, no! That was my day! I loved that dress! That was the dress that I was waiting for ever since [I was] a little girl looking in the windows at all the wedding gowns and my mother telling me ÒYou'll have one of those one someday.Ó

Lauren

Do you know where your dress is now?

Carole

I still have it! I might pull it out in pieces but É and I have the veil and the hat with the veil attached. Yeah.

Lauren

Do you think traditions like a veil or a white dress or putting something borrowed something blue, do you think those traditions are important for weddings?

Carole

I think it's nice.

Lauren

Do you think it helps the marriage at all to follow those traditions?

Carole

No. It doesnÕt do that. It's either good or it isn't. Hopefully you pick the right man!

Lauren

Looking back now thinking about your wedding what's one word that you would describe the experience of getting married? What's one word?

Carole

Wonderful!